Shays, Myra B.
Myra B. Shays, 93, died on Saturday April 12, 2025 at home in Providence, RI. Born in Brooklyn, NY to the late Samuel Berger and Pauline (Rosenbloom) Berger Zuckman, she grew up in Brooklyn and Manhattan with her twin brother, Arnold.
A graduate of Tufts University (Class of 1953), Myra loved language and learning. After raising her three children, she enrolled in paralegal training and enjoyed a second career in law, working in New York City and then in Providence at Brown, Rudnick, Berlack & Israelis, LLP until her retirement in 2001.
Myra was deeply committed to the Jewish organizations where she lived on Long Island, in New York City, and in the Providence area. She served as president of the Garden City (LI) Jewish Center Sisterhood, and as president of NYC’s Golda Meir Chapter of Hadassah. She was a Life Member of Hadassah, continuing her participation after moving to Rhode Island. Myra also volunteered with the Jewish Seniors Agency and Jewish Elder Care of Rhode Island. She had been a member of Temple Habonim of Barrington, RI where she volunteered as a library co-manager, and was a spirited longtime participant in its weekly Lunch and Learn group. Members of Habonim looked forward to Myra’s annual Yom Kippur teachings on the story of Jonah as each year she’d find new interpretations to explore.
Myra was never one to stand on the sidelines. In 1982 she joined the NYC chapter of PFLAG, helping to provide a welcoming and enlightening space for families and friends of LGBTQ+ individuals. After moving to Rhode Island, Myra founded the Providence PFLAG chapter in 1998. She established its Board of Directors, led monthly meetings to support parents and families, and grew the chapter’s presence in the area for the following 15 years.
In 2013 when Myra stepped down as chapter president, she was honored at a State House recognition ceremony during which many Providence and Rhode Island leaders spoke to acknowledge her service to the community. She remained active in Providence PFLAG serving on the Membership Committee and continuing to participate in the annual Pride March riding on the chapter’s float. In 2018, at the chapter’s twentieth anniversary celebration, she became the first recipient of Providence PFLAG’s “Myra B. Shays Making a Difference Award” presented to people who – like Myra – exemplify “integrity, credibility, and a passion for improving the lives of our members and individuals in the LGBTQ+ community.”
Myra believed in showing up for what matters. She was a writer and editor with OPTIONS Magazine, a public educator with Living Wills and Health Care Proxies, a responder on the GLBT Helpline, and a judge for the Annual Academic Decathlon. She loved The New York Times crossword puzzle, multi-part harmony, a good game of scrabble, and sour cream on just about anything.
Myra was a devoted mother of three: Harlan Shays, his wife Shawn Sager, of Raleigh, NC, Felice Shays of Brooklyn, NY, and Barbara Shays, her husband Charlie Seelig, of Providence. She was a beloved grandmother to Diana, Jordan, Rebecca, and Rosalie. She was a steadfast sister to her twin brother Arnold Berger of Cleveland, OH.
Burial will be private on Long Island, NY. A memorial service will be held on Sunday, April 20th, 1:00 pm at Congregation Agudas Achim, 901 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA, 02703. Shiva will be observed at the home of Barbara Shays and Charlie Seelig, Sunday, April 20th through Tuesday, April 22nd from 6:00 pm to 8:00 pm with Shiva minyanim being held at 7:00 pm each night. Shiva will also be held on the afternoons of Monday and Tuesday from 2:00 pm – 4:00 pm.
To livestream the memorial service, please click here.
In lieu of flowers, contributions in her memory may be made to these organizations:
- Garden City Jewish Center, 168 Nassau Blvd, Garden City, NY 11530
- MAZON Jewish Response to Hunger, P.O Box 96119, Washington D.C. 20090
- PFLAG of Greater Providence, P.O Box 41344, Providence, RI 02940
- Options Magazine, PO Box 6406, Providence, RI 02940
Myra was the first contact I had with PFLAG and she assisted
me on my journey to work with my daughter on her journey as a member of the lgbtqia+community. I have been a member and board member of PFLAG ever since. Thank you thank you thank you Myra for your guidance and support. You will be forever woven into the tapestry of my life. On a lighter note, Myra and I often spoke about our mutual love of juniors cheesecake! Who knew?
Myra was a fierce ally and friend. We visited Trinity Rep and asked directors questions. She passionately guided PFLAG and helped many along the way. She will be missed.
So Sorry to learn of Myra’s passisng. We were quite close many years ago when we worked on the Temple Habionim library. Unfoirtunstely, we lost touch when we both retired. However, I still have fond memories. Unfortunately, my health precludes my being able to attend any of her servifces.
My condolences to the loved one Myra left behind. I only met her once but my memories of her are fond. This is a lovely obituary and an excellent testament to her many accomplishments in her long and active life.
Harlan, Felice, Barbara, and family,
My sincere condolences on Myra’s passing.
I cannot express the impact your mother made on my life and many other LGBTQIA people in Rhode Island.
I was blessed to meet her at a Providence chapter meeting, and was honored to learn from her, serve on PFLAG’s board with her, and receive such kind advice and love.
Thank you for your beautiful light, Myra.
I bring PFLAG and your lessons up at my high school’s GSA.
Thank you, Shays family for sharing your mother with us.
All my love!
Carol-Anne Hebert- Villanova
We met this incredible lady back in 2001 when we first arrived in Providence. We were looking for a grocery store and a bit bewildered as to where it was. Myra just happened to be there on the corner–very proper, well dressed, and as friendly and helpful as one could ever be. We commented on the pin she wore ‘Straight, but not narrow’ and she then told us she was the President of the local PFLAG chapter. From there it was a 25 year enduring friendship with this remarkable lady, one of a kind, a ‘gem’, and ‘bigger than life’. She will never be forgotten and she truly brought us and many others happiness and joy to be around her. You are lucky to have had this matriarch in your lives for all your years and we were lucky to have her in ours. Celebrate her wonderful life!